Wisdom and good judgment live together, for wisdom knows where to discover knowledge and understanding. Proverbs 8:12
So… about the tarp… You own a house, over time the roof gets damaged. Instead of fixing it right you throw a tarp on it to keep the rain out. Maybe you change it every three – 6 months depending on the weather. You discard the old and replace it when a storm comes and blows the old one off as it exposes the damage. Or when the sun shines you don’t need it.
Your HEART is the ROOF, when it was damaged, early on you learned to cover the damage using women/men, and whatever validates you as a tarp. You went through life got married, the storms came and went. The roof held up ok for a while. But after a while… the damage to the roof needed to be repaired but that was a lot of work and the cost seemed too great so you covered it. You met someone and had an affair. The first tarp in your marriage that was personalized. You not only had to cover the wound, you also had to hide the sin, You felt guilt and shame, so you removed that tarp and discarded it, hurting someone in the process. You covered up your roof with a different tarp, work, busyness, trips and material things… hoping that would be enough to make the guilt and shame go away. So it seems the sun is shining. And you no longer need a tarp. Then a storm hits, this time accompanied by a tornado… your spouse has an affair, your marriage is falling apart, and you start desperately searching for a new tarp. And you look everywhere. You like to learn, and think that reading books will help you, a different kind of tarp but a tarp none the less. You pursue God using Him as a tarp as well. Then you meet a group of people, and get close to some of them, you have people and leadership skills and in your pain you reach out and it feels good to help/counsel others and you use them as a tarp, and once again the damage is hidden. All of a sudden you realize your tarp is too flimsy, you want one that has more substance more connection, stronger, deeper. You take the flimsy tarp off and throw it away. Hurting yourself and others in the process. The stronger tarp though. Well wow, that tarp stays for almost 6 months. The tarp gets comfortable, it feels safe. Initially it is refreshing... But as time goes on the weight of this tarp starts to get to be too much, it is weighing down on the festering damage of your roof. You lift the edge of the tarp. But the tarp is stuck, stuck to your wounds, stuck to you. Then a tsunami hits, you lose your job. And with that the tarp gets yanked right off and once again discarded, but not completely, you fold it up and put it away. Your next tarp? Exercise, Alcohol, pornography, more busyness, shopping? You have a new job, meet another special woman someone who is using you as their tarp… and you are using them …another bright and shiny new tarp. And so the cycle continues.
If you don’t transform, your suffering will transmit it – Richard Rohr
Taking off our tarps and fixing the damage comes with a cost. The cost of revisiting pain, of choosing not a tarp but an Almighty construction crew, “Father, Son and Holy Spirit”. Wanting a tarp so desperately at times because the pain just seems too much. But the more times we choose our Almighty construction crew, the more we see the actual cost of the tarp, we see that a Tarp is actually a short term -T-oxic, A-cid, R-elief P-rogram. And not a permanent repair. And the cost of each TARP becomes greater than the last.
God can heal a broken heart… but He has to have all the pieces - Anonymous
My prayer is this - that you have the courage to remove your tarps, “Your Roof is Worth Fixing”. The Almighty Construction Crew is waiting… and the price of the repair has already been paid.
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